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Friday, August 8, 2008

Britney Spears linked to 'Pussycat' lesbian stripper role

Comeback contender Britney Spears has been linked to many oddball things during her tumultuous time on Earth.

Let's see...there's her connection with those merry Mickey Mouse folk, her penchant for quickie marriages, popping out love kids, and a rather naughty habit of not wearing underwear. Tsk.

But nothing beats her latest venture.

The interwebnet has been buzzing with the rumour (and I stress rumour) that Spears has been chosen by director Quentin Tarantino to star in his remake of the 1965 cult film Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

Aside from the horror that yet another classic is about to be tinkered with (and undoubtedly slaughtered), there's the hideous prospect of seeing Spears fumble like a fembot on the silver screen as a maniacal, killer lesbian stripper.

Russ Meyers will be spinning in his grave. Boo hiss, indeed.

Like I say, it's purely a rumour at this stage. Tarantino, who is currently occupied directing his "re-imagining" of The Dirty Dozen called Inglorious Bastards, has responded to the Pyssycat re-make rumours with "That's complete bullsh**."

But that hasn't stopped the tabloids from milking the rumour for all it's worth.

British newspaper the Mirror also says Spears is lined up for the saucy role.

And just to raise the gossip bar a notch higher, they even speculate that Spears' "violent character murders a man with her bare hands. She also has sex scenes with another girl - not a big deal for the singer who kissed Madonna on stage."

And a snitch supposedly said: "Quentin is convinced Britney will be brilliant.

"She [Spears] is delighted. She thinks it could turn her career and her life around.

"It is perfect Tarantino material. He wanted to get Britney first. She's playing the most important character."

There's absolutely no way that Spears is capable of steering a big production on her own. I mean, have you seen the roadkill that was her 2002 flop Crossroads? Talk about the cinematic equivalent of a sedative.

Update: A mouthpiece for Spears says:

"Though she definitely intends to explore acting roles down the road, right now she's concentrating on recording her next album."

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